It was time for a true confession.
I’m not Catholic, but I thought maybe I needed to go to a priest. So, I went to the High Priest and said:
“I’ve been cheating on you Jesus for quite some time. I have chased after other lovers.”
I sat and wondered what happened to the girl who couldn’t wait to sit in her room alone with her Lord and just talk to Him? (With no expectation of anything in return but just His sweet presence and being together.)
Usually when an affair happens there is some kind of breakdown in the relationship before the actual affair. We begin to think the grass is greener on the other side. Here is what’s been on my new lawn:
- Busyness
- Social Media
- Being in “Ministry” and doing things for Jesus instead of being with Him.
- Pleasing others
- My own self-absorption
If you also struggle with some infidelity in your heart can I ask you this question?
Why in the world do we do this??
We know Jesus is everything. We know He is what fills us, completes us, and truly had us from hello.
Then why?
John Eldredge nails it in his new book All Things New, about our cravings:
We are desperate, lustful creatures. We look to marriage, (or the hope of marriage), a child, our work, food, sex, alcohol, adventure, the next dinner out, the new car, anything to touch the ache inside of us. We are ravenous beings.
Ravenous beings is correct. And let’s be honest we also don’t want to wait on Jesus.
We want to be seen, known, loved, cherished, satisfied, full, complete, entertained, and NOW please. Supersized. And sometimes those things that feel and look so real in front of us seem so much easier to grab for first.
But here is the really good news. Sooner or later, we get sick of ourselves, egos, and all the new things that at first sparkled and shined. And then we hear Him speaking louder than all of our frivolous trappings saying:
“What is a man to gain the whole world and lose his own soul?” (Matthew 16:26)
We realize once again the ache in our hearts could not be filled by people, places, or things.
His words come back to me from Revelation 2 when He is speaking to the church of Ephesus (did you catch that? A church of believers just like you and I):
“I know your deeds and your hard work and perseverance. You have pursued hardships for my name and not grown weary. Yet, I hold this against you:
“You have forsaken your first love. Repent and do the things you did at first.”
From now on when I begin to chase after other lovers and get caught up in forsaking my One True Love, I pray those words echo in my mind, “Do the things you did at first…
My dear sister or brother in Christ- Did you catch how He used the word first twice in that sentence? Let’s keep Him there.
Because the only grass that is greener on the other side is the one Jesus is standing on.
Image source: canstockphoto.com
