I sat with tears spilling off my cheeks and cried out to my husband, “Why does He always make me listen! I don’t want to it’s soooo hard!” I was venting my anger to my husband about issues I was having in my heart, mind and life and God was challenging me to take the narrow road and do what He said and I wasn’t feeling it.
I hadn’t been feeling it for awhile and I quit listening to Him and ignored His nudges. I didn’t want to do what He said; it went against everything my flesh felt. I had been around this mountain with God so many times, but still I wanted my way and I was acting like a rebellious two year old kicking and screaming in the corner refusing to listen.
So I went about my way for some time and my heart and spirit grew sick. And I knew I was getting worse, but my self-righteous, stubborn attitude prevailed.
But, then it happened.
As it always does.
The pain of my situation became greater than my pride or having to have my own way and I couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t even stand my own self, I was miserable.
My dad always says pain is at times our greatest asset and we usually can’t change until we have had enough of it. Ugh.
And our Heavenly Father essentially says the same thing:
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.
Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called Sons of God. (Matthew 5:1-9)
We desire healing and blessing from God but we hate to do the hard work to get it. The denying of ourselves. The killing of our pride, egos, and selfishness.
But, it’s when our hearts are in a position of brokenness and humility and we empty ourselves of our pride, are we then ready to receive God’s healing power and blessing.
I picture the woman with the issue of blood. In a culture where women were disregarded, looked down upon and seen as nothing, she comes seeking her healing.
She is broken.
Desperate.
And down on that dry, dusty, desert floor willing to do anything to get her healing.
She is in the perfect posture to receive.
With outstretched hands, with people’s dirty feet scuffling around her, with her pride and dignity thrown out the window, she brazenly, in faith, reaches for the hem of Christ’s garment.
And the scriptures say she immediately became well.
And these were Christ’s words to her: “Daughter, you took a risk trusting me, and now you’re healed and whole. Live well, live blessed!”
So what’s it going to be friends? Will we do whatever it takes to get well and whole? Will we trust Him? Or will we continue on in our pouting, stiff necked, stubborn ways?
May we get low, honest and reach.
Isaiah 57:15
“I live in a high and holy place,
But also with him who is contrite and lowly in spirit,
To revive the spirit of the lowly and to revive the heart of the contrite.
