You are an idiot.
You suck at this parenting thing.
Why can’t I have more discipline?
You will never reach your dreams, you don’t have what it takes.
You are a quitter and a failure.
You will never be enough.
There you go again, doing what you said you wouldn’t do.
I roll out of bed, pour my coffee and look out the window wondering If I will ever be able to silence the voices inside of my head.
Bullies of shame, self-doubt, criticism, perfectionism.
Recently I had a conversation with a family member on the phone:
“Will you stop doubting yourself Holly? Will you believe what God says about you?”
There are days I feel confident and I’m believing what God says..
But, then the bullies revisit.
And peck and yell loud enough in my ear that I start to believe them. Sometimes to the point I shrink back and quit whatever it is I’m striving towards or believing good about myself.
I’m wondering if you ever feel this way.
If you let the voices of self-doubt, fear and condemnation force you in a corner, keep you backed in and held prisoner.
Me too.
After I dropped off my son and came back home I got on my knees to silence the bullies. The lies.
I rushed to my bible and opened it to this: I lift my eyes to the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord the Maker of heaven and earth. (Psalm 121:1-2)
There are moments in our lives where we just need to be rescued from ourselves. From our dysfunctional patterns and belief systems about ourselves.
When we replace the lies with truth.
Because friend let’s face it, the word of God tells us we see through the glass dimly. So many times we are not seeing ourselves clearly.
And Satan wants nothing more than to keep our vision blurry.
I’m thinking of when Jesus is in the desert, getting ready to fulfill His purpose and Satan says to him mockingly, “IF you are the Son of God then tell these stones to become bread.”
Christ has been fasting for 40 days and 40 nights. He is hungry and depleted.
He replies: “Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.“
Satan knows Christ is getting ready to set the world on fire. And he’s trying to divert Jesus in his depleted state and cause doubt. “IF you are the Son of God….
We do not always see our worth. Our strength. What we have to offer the world.
BUT, you better believe Satan does.
And he will stop at nothing to keep us listening to the lies in our head, backed in that corner in order to keep us from the purpose and plans God has for us.
And you know what God has to say about that? “Nobody puts baby in a corner.“
Seriously :), this is what God has to say to each of us and The Voice we need to listen to:
You are beautiful.
You are enough.
You are strong.
You are chosen.
You are fiercely loved.
No more striving.
No more putting yourself down.
Come to me. Lay your burdens at my feet.
Let me speak my love over you.
Seek me.
Let me show you how I see you.
So, the next time the bullies in our heads come?
May we go sit on our daddy’s lap and let Him speak the truth over us.
Man does not live on bread alone. But the very words of God. Matthew 4:4
The true ones. The real ones. The ones we desperately need to hear.
