Have you ever been hurt by others and so ambushed by the pain and shock of it all that you still can’t wrap your mind around it?
Yeah me too. I’ve had some pretty, big bombs dropped on me, I’m sure you have as well. And at times it hurts so stinking bad we want to rip them a new one (and we do sometimes let’s be honest) and sometimes we want to rip God a new one too. (Let’s be really honest.)
At times when I’ve been devastated by others, I’ve gotten angry at God. I’ve wondered really God? Where were you? You knew they were going to do that. You knew they were going to say that. You knew they were going to hurt me. Why didn’t’ you protect me? Or defend me? Didn’t you say you would?
I’ve probed Gods’ word and heart about forgiveness. And He’s been teaching me some things (I’m a slow learner but willing to try) here’s a few:
- When others hurt us, usually it is not done intentionally. We feel they personally set out to betray us but in reality; it usually has more to do with their brokenness, sin, and places in their hearts not yet healed by God. And the enemy uses those places to attack us. (Epshesians 6).
- I’ve hurt others too. In big ways. And just like number one, it came from my own brokenness and places not yet healed.
- If a Christian has hurt you, remember they are God’s child too, and He knows why they hurt you and He also knows their side of the story. And He sees the situation through eyes of mercy, grace and truth. On both sides. May we ask God to show us their side?
- Sometimes as believers we use the whole having “boundaries” or “I’m not going to be a doormat” to excuse our unwillingness to forgive.
- There is power in great marriages, friendships and relationships in Christ. The enemy wants to separate those relationships in our lives, and He will do anything He can to do so. Who is He trying to separate us from? Better yet, whom have we let him separate us from?
- God forgives me in the same measure I forgive others. (Matthew 6:14) (ouch this one scares me).
- This one was huge when He revealed it to me, when I can’t forgive someone and I hold onto it for years and years it proves one thing: my lack of trust in God. Because He has promised to make all things right, whether this side of heaven or the next. We have to trust He has a plan and will work in any pain brought into our lives for the good.
- Why did Jesus tell us to forgive and love our enemies? Because it shows our witness and not just our words. It shows us putting our faith into action even when it’s hard.
- Our level of maturity in Christ is revealed when we are wounded, and by our willingness to forgive or not forgive. (that one really hurts).
- May we give out mercy and forgiveness with the same measure our Father lavishly pours out onto us.
It’s Christ’s perfect love and forgiveness that changes and heals us. Because we do not deserve it. And when we forgive others it releases the supernatural power of God in our relationships to bring about transformation, because love is what changes hearts, not anger, bitterness or pride.
That is why Satan so fiercely opposes it.
We are going to be hurt and wounded deeply in this life. Even at times by those closest to us. And forgiving them is going to be one of the hardest things we will ever have to do.
But, forgiving others through the power of Christ, may be the very thing that catapults us into miracles in our lives and relationships.
May we be willing.
Forgivness is what God often uses when I ask him to help me Love more:)
Amen sister! Lord give us your compassionate heart!
I’ve learned over the years that it is so exhausting to hold on to bitterness. It is so much less stressful to forgive. Holding on to it rather than forgiving makes you so angry . Also that person you are bitter with more than likely doesn’t care so why continue to do that to yourself.
Tiffany- Girl I so know what you mean. THe bitterness is so not worth it! So exhausting is right!